Dressed For Excess
Published: August 3rd, 2010
By: Jim Mullen

Dressed for excess

Sue and I stopped at an interstate rest stop last week and – no surprise in the middle of the summer – it was packed with travelers. Very badly dressed travelers. Let’s think about this – you’re traveling on the interstate, which means you have to have enough money to have a car, gas and insurance, yet you don’t have enough money to buy a decent pair of pants? I’m pretty sure we were the only people in the whole place wearing long pants. We were also the only people wearing clothes that did not have some kind of (usually rude) message on it. When did clothes turn into bumper stickers for our bodies? I’m sorry that you’re with stupid and I’m happy you are pregnant, but I deduced those things without your T-shirts. I could tell from the mullet the guy in front of me at the coffee bar had that he was a fan of Lynyrd Skynyrd long before I saw the band’s tour schedule on his t-shirt. Are you really trying to impress me with that XXXXL Ivy League T-shirt? Were you a first-stringer on the competitive pancake-eating team?

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