Goodbye, Cruel World
Published: December 19th, 2012
By: Brian Golden

Goodbye, cruel world

While I’m most assuredly not what anybody in their right mind would call a “believer” when it comes to the imminent Mayan Apocalypse of Dec. 21, 2012 (hard to believe it’s here already), I am, as a big fan of apocalyptic scenarios – zombies, aliens and the like – fairly certain the first thing I’ll do Friday morning is look to the sky for a glimpse of whatever giant meteor and/or rogue planet is hurtling through space to destroy the planet as we know it.

Hey, it could happen.

Then again, nobody seems to know the exact time of day we’ll go quietly into oblivion, sucked mercilessly into a mysterious, undiscovered black hole or obliterated by “Nibiru,” the aforementioned rogue planet that is – apparently – on a collision course with Earth. Chances are, if it happens between ... oh, let’s say midnight and 6 a.m., I’ll be blissfully unaware, snug in my bed and dreaming of a white Christmas.

Anytime after that is another story, of course, yet I’m feeling fairly confident in regards to our chances for survival. I mean, zombies and aliens are one thing, but a catastrophic encounter with another planet? Let’s be real, here, folks.

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