Be afraid ... be very afraid

I havenít been sleeping very well, lately, and Ė as the saying goes Ė I know the reason why. Itís not that I fear an imminent zombie apocalypse or soon-to-be hostile alien takeover (hey, it could happen); Iím not sick or otherwise incapacitated; and while I do suffer from an overactive imagination (dreams, nightmares and the like ... typically involving zombie apocalypses or alien invasions), I usually manage to sleep my way through the night.

The truth be told, itís an upcoming vacation that has me up and shivering in the wee hours of the morning. To be more specific, our esteemed editorís upcoming (and well-deserved, I might add) vacation.

Why should that scare the living daylights out of me, you ask? Hey, Golden, donít be a wimp, itís only two days, you say? Because a good portion of the responsibility involved in piecing together Chenango Countyís Hometown Daily (since 1891, no less) will be mine for a couple of days.

I know, I know, it canít be that bad, right?

Iíll let you know on Monday.

Needless to say, Iíve been training ... perhaps not rigorously ... but steadily over the past two weeks for the task, one that Iím honestly excited for (the constant worrying just adds to the excitement ... really). Do I think I can handle it? Well, thatís not really the problem, because Iím sure I can ... and will ... somehow. No, my problem is quite the opposite.

I tend to over-stress myself (needlessly, most of the time) when faced with any new responsibility, whether I already know I can do it or not. Itís kind of like stage fright, in that regard.

And itís not like Iíve got much of a choice, when you think about it, considering Ed. Ė as you Ď30 Secondsí addicts know him Ė is certainly not going to miss out on his vacation.

I donít blame him one bit ... as I said, itís well deserved.

To be honest, I faced a similar sort of fear when I first took over The Evening Sunís police/fire/EMS/court beat all those months ago. Can you blame me? Itís not like thereís any formal training for the job; it involves dealing with some of our countyís more significant leaders, not to mention the criminal element involved; and ... for lack of a better reason, itís probably the most sought-after beat.

Trust me, I know, I petitioned for it (a lot) when it became available once again ... and celebrated when I got it.

This job has been nothing if not ďfull of surprisesĒ since I first sat down behind the desk and computer here in my little corner of The Evening Sun universe: fires, major and minor accidents, trials (and tribulation), earthquakes (remember that one), good times, bad times and all that comes with a daily deadline.

I wouldnít change it for the world.

What can I say? Iíve come to love and respect this job and Ė besides my never-ending affair with the blues and guitar Ė it is, in many ways, all that I know now. I canít imagine my life not being here, surrounded by the hustle and bustle of the newsroom ... particularly as said deadline approaches.

Itís addictive, almost, the way you come to accept Ė and embrace (sometimes) Ė that feeling; it becomes the norm.

Therefore, Iím going to do my best, not only to de-stress myself a bit, but to enjoy this new responsibility. Not to mention I did ask for it (always think before you speak, Golden, think before you speak) ... literally.

Regardless, you faithful Evening Sun readers, I promise I will do my absolute best to make sure the paper actually makes its way to the newsstand (and your homes), intact, on time and with the same brand of news youíve come to expect from what is truly a dedicated and hard-working staff.

A staff that includes Ė of course Ė our esteemed editor ... who will be on vacation ... and not here.

Now Iím scared.

Follow me on Twitter ... @evesunbrian.

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