United we stand?

The two-headed ďdebate monsterĒ thatís seemingly the basis for our current social structure in America is as destructive (and in many ways utterly pointless) as anything I can possibly imagine. And if you donít believe me, just take a look around, because itís not too pretty out there. Or better yet go out in public Ė among the masses Ė and try to start a polite discussion on hydrofracturing, terrorism, politics, war, peace, racism, conservatism versus liberalism, religion, the tea party or the driving abilities of the modern teenager ... $10 bucks says you canít do it (at least politely).

In fact, Iíd be surprised if two people with differing backgrounds, religions, viewpoints or political leanings could agree on how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in this day and age.

And yes, I truly believe itís gotten that bad.

Case in point Ė the continuing struggle and downright senseless division between our decidedly partisan politicians (who have it so tough, I might add) and the fact that Ė as far as Iím concerned Ė each and every one (including the recent tea-flavored additions) have failed their constituents in every way. I say that because, in all honesty, when was the last time the Łber-wealthy body politic in Washington really accomplished anything remotely resembling efficient change for the better of all.

To me, it seems a long, long time.

Unlike many people, however, I refuse to simply point a finger at one side or the other, not to mention our commander-in-chief. I donít think the blame in this case is so easily cast. As for Obama ... am I happy with every decision the man has made? No. Do I still support the man? Yes.

Why, you ask? First of all, because thatís my right as an American citizen. Secondly, I think he deserves the benefit of the doubt, considering most (if not all) presidents burdened with the likes of Bushís portfolio of senseless decisions would have already fallen to the pressure.

Regardless, Monday nightís CNN/Tea Party debate was a perfect example of itís-true-because-I-say-it-is politics. I particularly liked the verbal sparring between presidential hopefuls Michele Bachmann and Rick Perry, neither of whom I would vote for even if you had a gun to my head.

Said Bachmann, ďThe drug company gave thousands of dollars in political donations to the governor ... and this is just flat-out wrong.Ē

Perry responded, ďThe company was Merck, and it was a $5,000 contribution that I had received from them. I raise about $30 million. And if youíre saying that I can be bought for $5,000, Iím offended.Ē

Thatís right, Mr. Perry is offended that anyone would accuse him of accepting such a paltry sum for ďbeing bought.Ē Does this strike anyone else as one of the most inane (yet probably true) statements ever made? On top of that, I guess Iíd never quite realized just how lucrative running for president could be.

Perry raises about $30 million? Hell, I canít wait to run for president in 2016 (following Barack Obamaís second term ... what can I say, Iím certainly not voting for Palin, Perry, Bachmann or the rest of that crew).

And why shouldnít I? Iím a natural born citizen of the United States (born January 12, 1977 in the Chenango Memorial Hospital, no less), Iíll be 39 years old (four years older than the requisite 35), Iíve been a resident of the United States all my life, Iíve never been impeached (at least not yet) and Iíve never rebelled against the United States, although Iíll admit itís tempting sometimes, especially after watching Monday nightís tea party debate.

Then again, Iíve never been an outspoken Christian, which seems to be an unofficial qualification for the presidency these days. And donít give me that ďAmerica was founded on ChristianityĒ nonsense. It wasnít, thatís why we have the Bill of Rights.

Yet both Bachmann and Perry are (and I would add ridiculously) forthright in their religious convictions. Which is also nonsense, because I could personally care less which God they believe in, Iíd rather hear some intelligent discussion about the direction our country should be going in.

Notice I said intelligent discussion.

As for you ... err ... people ... that still havenít given up the whole ďObama is a MuslimĒ idea, well, I donít have much hope for you.

After all, the truth is much easier to come by if you make it up as you go along, right? Thatís the case Ė it seems Ė in Washington today. And that, my friends, is a sad, sad thing.

Follow me on Twitter ... @evesunbrian.

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