We might as well talk about Paris, too

EDITOR’S NOTE: Evening Sun reporters love to argue. The sides taken in this argument were chosen arbitrarily and do not necessarily reflect the true opinions of the authors. This week, Tyler Murphy and Jeff Genung discuss the denouement of the Paris Hilton saga.

Paris Hilton has been set free from her luxury cell and allowed to serve the rest of her time under house arrest, or as I like to call it “mansion arrest.”

Hey, when you’re the spoiled rich kid of a ba-zillonaire, why should you have to spend time in jail for something as ridiculous as drunk driving and probation violation? Besides it’s only fair with her medical condition (apparently she had a hard time adjusting to the prison food), so how could we keep a clear conscience and force that poor girl to suffer? We wouldn’t want her developing an eating disorder or anything ... uh ... again.

Anyway, think of the bigger picture – with poor Paris behind bars it would undoubtedly hinder her ability to be a role model for our teenagers, just like she said before she went in, “I bring excitement to otherwise mundane or boring lives.” Obviously, she was talking about us. So as you can see, a fair justice system is a small price to pay in order to show our younger generation that all that matters is the almighty dollar. – TDM

With all the media attention focused on this case (and spare me the fallback argument of blaming the media for giving the people bread and circuses when that’s exactly what they want), it’s clear that Paris Hilton does indeed bring excitement to our otherwise mundane and boring lives. Personally, I think Paris’ early release was engineered from the start. It just makes for a better story. Having the heiress do her time diligently and without incident would barely even register on the E! scale. But a get-out-jail-free card because her tender tummy can’t stand the standard-issue prison slop? That, my friend, is pure gold. We’ll be chewing on this one for weeks. Resist the temptation to overanalyze it. – JMG

The thing is I was joking and you were not. Maybe what you said harbors some remote truth. I would just like to remind you of that crazy lady who stands on top of the courthouse with her sword, scale and most importantly her blindfold. Justice does not distinguish between her subjects and the most important indifference she embraces is the one between rich and poor. I knew things were always a little screwy with high-priced lawyers and those defending themselves on their welfare checks, but this is even worse. She was guilty as sin and sentenced. Paris tried hard to worm her way out with emotional distress and social connections and she finally got her way because of what we all know... money. Time, I thought, was supposed to be hard – I only wish we could have sent her to the gulag. Laugh at your own jokes about media and corruption all you want. Those rich aristocrats holding that tightening leash around our hard-working necks are laughing even louder. – TDM

I look at the whole Paris Hilton saga as a silly diversion, not a social commentary. To attach this melodrama to your oft-repeated conspiracy theories about a malevolent oligarchy is a bit of a stretch. Was Paris-gate really a tragic miscarriage of justice with ramifications that will be felt for generations? Please. Giving her that much importance in the grand scheme of things feeds into her already overblown ego. If we’re going to analyze about how justice is meted out against celebrities, Paris Hilton isn’t where I’d start. Remember a guy called O.J.? Or better yet, and more recently, scot-free singer Brandy, whose alleged automotive mishap actually resulted in a death? Makes Ms. Hilton seem trivial by comparison, which is exactly what she is. – JMG

Well since you’re on the tainted side when it comes to the media, it’s easy to understand why you might become brainwashed by that ‘everyone who takes things seriously is a nut’ attitude, but simple fact is, I am an American citizen. Paris is my equal. Her getting out is yet another of the increasing number of reminders that there exists a level of citizenship based on economics. This was a big case only because everyone was watching, which makes it even more of a slap in the face. I find if funny but only because it’s so ridiculous and unfortunately predictable at the same time. Paris Hilton is famous for the sole reason that she is rich; all she did was get born under a rich sign and was such a spoiled brat she attracted media attention.

What’s the matter? Can’t you address the injustice of the greater issue without making some offbeat quip about pop culture and handing one more fix to the entertainment addicts? It’s funny and sounds good, but it really doesn’t mean a thing. – TDM

My point exactly. The entire Paris Hilton brouhaha, which has given cause to your penchant for liberal flag-waving, doesn’t really mean a thing. If this “case” has any significance in the annals of history, I will, posthumously of course, eat my words. (And incidentally, if I’m so tainted by immersion in mainstream media, I’d like to remind you where your paycheck comes from). The fact that we’ve devoted the last 30 or so inches of copy to this issue is yet another testament to the undeniable conclusion that we, as in the American public, are so fascinated by the trivialities of celebrity that we gloss over the important issues, or, in your case, try desperately to find deeper meaning in matters that ultimately have none. – JMG

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