Life on TV

After a very stressful day of house shopping and doctor’s appointments. I was relieved last night when I finally got to go home and relax. As I was lying in bed last night waiting for the baby to fall asleep and watching Fox’s hit drama “House,” I realized that life would be a whole lot easier if it were on television.

In reality, I took my sick baby to a normal doctor’s office yesterday. After being sick for over a month, coughing and wheezing, I was told, we don’t know what’s wrong. If he’s still sick in a month or two, bring him back. I was less than thrilled with the non-diagnosis, but had no choice but to shell out my co-pay and go on my way.

But if we were on television, we could have seen the infamous Dr. House, and no matter how obscure the diagnosis may be, House would have known exactly what it was. He would look at the baby like he was a snake of some sort and make insulting and infuriating remarks, by in the end, he would know exactly what was wrong and everyone would be thanking him. Although, it might have taken roughly an hour for him to come up with the solution, during which time the people he works with would make several wrong diagnoses and he would call them names, but what the heck, we’re usually in the waiting room for that long anyway, and at least this way there’s some entertainment.

Back in reality I spent a portion of the day looking at houses with my real estate agent. We’ve seen several that have been far from acceptable, and yesterday was no different. After walking, and rolling through the house (the floor seemed to slope at a 60-degree angle, and we had to hold on to the wall to keep our balance), we decided there may be a smidge of structural damage, and decided to pass.

On television this never would have happened. In fact we probably wouldn’t have to look for a house at all, because Ty Pennington and the cast of “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” would come to us. They would tear down our current home and build one eight times as big with a million gadgets that we would never need or use, but that would be really cool to look at. We would make sure before to tell him all of our favorite activities, like swimming and rock climbing, and by the time we returned from our dream vacation in Tahiti, there would be a swimming pool in the upstairs den and a rock climbing wall in the activities room. Who needs to buy a house when you can have a design team come to you and build you one for free?

If life were on television, there’s no end to the possibilities. Of course things could take a bad turn if we ever ended up in the show “24” or heaven forbid “Martha Stewart Living,” so I guess I’ll just enjoy the stress I have now and occasionally watch a television show to help me relax.

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