If there’s one thing I know to be true, in this crazy world of motherhood; failure is inevitable! One of my personal favorite quotes, I see shared online quite often states; ‘Behind every great kid is a mom who’s pretty sure she’s screwing it all up.’ Oh the words of wisdom in this phrase. Let’s be honest, we’ve all been there. We’ve all felt this kind of failure, big or small, even if we don’t want to admit it to anyone else. But there’s hope, parenting styles can be so varied, from one child to the next and especially depending upon the situation. Hard as it may be sometimes, I try to see every failure as a chance for change and growth, for both me and my children.
In my life, sometimes failures are not huge events, more little moments of letdown. With summer in full swing, the schedule in our house has been very busy. We’ve been trying to squeeze in all the warm weather summer has to offer, on top of our regular schedules. All of this, I will admit, has led to a little lax in my parenting, primarily in the rule enforcing department. One thing I should say first, our son likes to hang out with the ‘big men’ in his life. He cannot wait to grow up and be ‘BIG’! But sometimes, like any child does, he picks up adult words. However, I’m not oblivious to this. It is 2014 and I know he is going to hear inappropriate words. For the most part, he is really good about not repeating them, but with school over and summer raging on, his ‘potty mouth’ has been out of control lately! Don’t get me wrong, he could be saying worse words then he is, but still, he’s five!
So when the words, began to shoot out on a family outing; parenting fail! This was an unpleasant failure to experience. In the end, a conversation was had and apologies were given, then it was time to move on.
After a failure, like this, I always like to reevaluate and reflect about what I was doing before and what I can do differently after. Parenting is an evolution. It’s always changing, never the same; as our children grow, we grow as parents right along with them. First, you can try researching new ideas and searching for different techniques to try, depending upon your situation. There really is a wealth of knowledge and factual information out there just waiting to be found and implemented. Sometimes, talking to other parents can do the trick. I find learning from other parents can be a real self-esteem builder, because chances are they are experiencing the same kind of struggles you are too. By talking to others, you will also find a great network for future support. Don’t they say ‘it takes a village to raise a child’ anyway? Also, if possible, try talking to your own parents about how you were as a child. But go beyond the embarrassing moment stories and how cute you were. Instead, ask more about how you acted and reacted in different kinds of situations growing up. Ask questions about your personality as a child too. Chances are your wee one, shares some of your own character traits. This information could be beneficial, when trying to find a parenting style that works well between you and your child. On top of all of these tips and tricks, remember in the end you have to listen to your heart. I believe if you are trying your best every day, then you must be doing something right!
Today is a new day. I will look past yesterday. I will start fresh. I will bask in the little moments of laughter, while my kids play in their pool in the sunshine. I will be thankful; I was given the privilege of raising these three precious dears. I wouldn’t change it for anything, failures included. I will continue to remind myself daily, that good or bad, as long as I put my best foot forward and make a whole hearted effort; I know I am doing the best for my family. I think if I do this, I shouldn’t be considered a failure in anyone’s book, especially my own.
I’d love to share more of my experiences and parenting ideas with you. Please follow me during the week on Facebook at ‘Baby Talk – with Rachel’ to read more and find some new ideas to share with your friends and family.