Shayne on You: Always running behind

Dear Maggie,

My husband is a great guy, but he can’t be on time to save his life. He’s always running behind schedule, and is always late for everything. This makes me miserable. Aside from that one annoying issue, he’s wonderful and we get along fine and have a happy marriage, but this one problem is driving me crazier by the day and I’m not sure what to do about it.

Signed,

Always Waiting

Dear Always Waiting,

Your husband is a great guy, you have a happy marriage, and you get along fine. So why are you choosing to put your focus on the one thing about him that drives you crazy, instead of on the dozens of things about him that make you feel great? No one is perfect. No matter who you’re with, you’ll find they have a flaw or two. It’s up to you whether you choose to home in on that flaw and obsess about it, or take a deep breath, and go with the flow.

The real matter is, your husband is probably making the healthier, wiser choice here. I have a tricky little heart issue now and then, and I’ve noticed that when I’m stressed out, especially if I’m running late for something and trying to get there in time, that’s when it kicks in the most. If, on the other hand, I can stop rushing, take a breath, decide I’ll get there when I get there, and just relax, I tend to feel tons better.

So rather than trying to change hubby’s habits, why not work on your own techniques a little? Deep breathing, counting to ten slowly, knowing that it’ll all get done, and it’ll all be fine, no matter what time you arrive, all those things can help immensely. Really, relax, it’ll be fine.

Maggie