Do These Glasses Make My Gut Look Big?
Published: January 10th, 2012
By: Jim Mullen

Do these glasses make my gut look big?

There’s nothing like a visit to the optometrist to make you feel old.

I’m already wearing trifocals – for distance on top, computer in the middle and reading on the bottom. I was afraid I would soon need quadrifocals: distance, computer, texting and reading. But it turns out my long-distance vision is actually improving.

After the exam, new prescription in hand, I went to order new glasses. The worst part of buying eyeglasses is that you can’t see what they look like on your face because – you need glasses! Duh! You’d think that by now some tech-savvy 18-year-old would have invented a 99-cent app that photographs your face and lets you see what you look like with different frames. Well, he hasn’t. (You know what a good name for it would be? Face Book. Too bad that’s taken.) So you try on frames and squint at yourself in the mirror and try to figure out what you look like, even though all you can see is a blur.

I asked the optometrist’s assistant what she thought looked best, and, without looking at me, she said, “Try these.” The ones I was looking at cost $147. The ones she wanted me to try cost $373 and weren’t covered by my insurance.

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