“Batten down the hatches, furl those sails ... all hands on deck!”
Or maybe ... “Secure the drawbridge and move those provisions within the walls ... archers, to your stations!”
Archers? Well, maybe not archers. But you get my drift, right?
No pun intended, of course.
Regardless, with today’s forecast of four to seven inches (of snow!) and the possibility of some sleet or freezing rain to boot, one would think we live in southern Florida, where they have towns with names like Frostproof, Sunrise, Coral Springs and Sylvan Shores, considering the reaction of some folks.
My only question is ... doesn’t anyone remember those Chenango County winters of old? You know, back when kids walked to school (walked?), uphill, both ways, carrying timber for the schoolhouse woodstove (not to mention their books)?
It’s just snow, people, and we’ve seen it all before. (In my best stormtrooper voice): You can go about your business. Move along, move along.
Yesterday, it seemed all the talk was focused on the impending snowfall, one which, you must admit, would’ve been considered mild in the past. These days, however, people seem to have forgotten how to deal (let alone drive) once the fluffy white stuff begins falling from the sky and accumulating on our streets and roadways.
Four to seven inches? You’re kidding me, right?
In fact, I even saw an honest-to-God news story on the tube this morning while preparing for this soon-to-be-disaster-level, catastrophic Leap Day. The focus? A run on sidewalk salt at a local market, of course, one unheard of in generations ... err ... decades?
I’m not even a winter enthusiast, as my family and friends know all too well, yet even I wouldn’t mind a little powder on the ground at this point. It would be ... I don’t know ... reassuring. Because you must admit, as far as winters go, this has been one for the record books, if not for your typical reasons.
No, about the only thing I ever truly enjoyed as a child – back when we had real winters – was the building of snow forts. And I’m not talking about any run-down little hovels here, I’m talking about snow forts, complete with multiple levels, enough rooms to get lost in and, of course, crenelated towers.
For the archers, obviously.
All joking aside (because four to seven inches of snow is no joke), I must admit it’s quite fascinating to see people scrambling to prepare for a “storm” that – in all reality – would’ve been considered nothing more than a minor inconvenience just a couple of years ago.
Then again, we all know just how reliable the weather man is, nowadays, and – God forbid – we might even end up with ten inches of snow ... or a foot ... or 14 inches.
What if I actually have to shovel?
Follow me on Twitter ... @evesunbrian.