Author Archive

Taste never takes a vacation

Why do so many people think that the arrival of summer means it's time to pack away all the clothes that actually fit them? That it's time to reveal their out-of-shape bodies ... read more...


Computer talk is cheap

The phone hadn't rung all day, which was a blessing because we'd been catching up on a thousand and one things around the house. For us, spring cleaning involves some heavy li... read more...


Please, invade my privacy

A world-famous entertainer announced that she and her boyfriend were splitting up in one of the saddest tweets I've ever read: "We have decided to go our separate ways. Please... read more...


TV or not TV

Remember when TV used to sign off for the night? No infomercials, no reruns, no experimental public-access foolishness -- nothing at all but snow. Or, if you were lucky, a tes... read more...


Plan the marriage, not the wedding

"I got an email today," Mel told me. "Chardonnay and Jackson are splitting up. They only got married four months ago. It's so sad. I played guitar at their wedding." "And you... read more...


You are what you plant

We have a big garden. A huge garden. I only wish that it was outside the house. And in a few weeks, when it is warmer, it will be, but right now there are bedding trays of tin... read more...


Fasten your bucket-list seat belt

Lots of people are making Bucket Lists: things they want to do before they kick the bucket. There's a danger in doing that, and it's not just tempting fate. What happens if yo... read more...


The museum of modern body art

I was at a doctor's office in a small town recently and overheard one patient in the waiting room talking to another. "There are four tattoo parlors on Main Street and not on... read more...


Musings on the mutability of time

For me, the first sign of spring is the ritual of setting the clocks to daylight saving time. Unfortunately, I don’t know how to change the time on most of my clocks. My therm... read more...


The envelope, please!

Years ago, media guru Tony Schwartz posed a simple but interesting question. “When a horse walks across the TV screen in ‘Bonanza,’” he asked, “is it acting?” Unlike humans (... read more...


The car of the future

We got a new car a month ago, and it hit me as we were signing the papers that we had probably just bought our last gas-powered car. We usually keep a car six or seven years, ... read more...


Where's Gutenberg when you need him?

I’ve heard for years that “no good deed goes unpunished,” but it seemed like a clever phrase being passed off as wisdom, something you might get in a fortune cookie on an off ... read more...


You are what you watch

On the evening news last night, one of the commercials ended with, “If you’re between the ages of 50 and 75, you may be eligible ...,” and I started to laugh. Who else do the... read more...


Today's special: Cacophony, with a side of the flu

“Hi, I’m Stacy, and I’ll be your server. Can I get you something to drink while you look at the menu?” she yelled over the high-decibel music. Over Stacy’s shoulder I could se... read more...


His and Her movies

Sue is dying to see “Les Miserables”; I can’t wait to see “Django Unchained.” She wants to see “Django” as much as she wants to eat giant sea slugs, and I want to sit through ... read more...



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