Author Archive

The real rat pack

Years ago, David Letterman was doing his show from Las Vegas for a week, and, as he walked out of his hotel one night, he ran into a raggedy man who asked him for $5 for food.... read more...


The unspeakable luxury of the Park-O-Matic

Here at Bailout Motors, we spend millions of dollars each year on market research to find out what the auto-buying public wants in a new car. And to my surprise, a vehicle tha... read more...


Fading memories of 2008

My memory is going. Iím still writing 2008 on my checks. Worse, Iím still writing checks, while everyone else is banking online. Well, not everyone else, just people with mone... read more...


Gross-ery shopping

There was a story on the news the other night about some grocery stores installing mini car washes to wash their shopping carts after each use. At first I thought it was an e... read more...


Gross-ery shopping

There was a story on the news the other night about some grocery stores installing mini car washes to wash their shopping carts after each use. At first I thought it was an ex... read more...


Thatís not a mint on your pillow

If you havenít booked a hotel room online yet, youíre in for a treat. Sue and I needed to stay overnight on a long car trip to a relativeís place last week. ďFind a hotel half... read more...


Santa donít gift jobs, little buddy

You ever wonder what I do the 364 days between Christmas Eves when Iím not delivering toys? Mostly, I try to figure out what your kids will want this Christmas. Youíll notice ... read more...


The children of Depression 2.0

My Dad never lost an opportunity to tell us how hard he had it during the Depression. While he never actually said, ďI had to walk 20 miles to school. Barefoot. Up hill each w... read more...


No more camípainí ads!

One of the great things about the recent election is that we wonít have to see another political commercial for two or three months, when, after a short break, the campaign fo... read more...


Sorry, I donít watch TV

I live next door to the most annoying couple in the world. You may have neighbors you donít get along with or neighbors that you have no use for, or neighbors with yapping dog... read more...


Foreign lands where the dollar still rules

The parking lots of the big discount stores have been getting more and more crowded since the economy went over Niagara Falls without a barrel. The people who used to shop at ... read more...


Howie Mandel would liven up a boring presidential debate

The verdict by all the TV pundits about the last presidential debate was unanimous. It was boring. Unlike, say, those riveting post-debate, cable-TV shows. Thereís nothing lik... read more...


When can we play the blame game?

ďThis is not the time to play the blame game,Ē I hear a lot of politicians talk about the financial crisis. When they werenít saying that, they were saying, ďThis is not the t... read more...


ĎLadies and gentlemen, your Powerball losersí

I flipped through the morning TV shows last week, and I didnít know who any of their ďfamousĒ guests were. Obviously, I am not watching enough television. ďHereís whatís-his-... read more...


Why canít the government be run like business?

Sometimes, when Iím waiting in line at the grocery store for a price check on a box of Ramen noodles or waiting for the cashier to get a new roll of nickels or waiting for a m... read more...



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